Thursday June 19
 
17:49
 
Sickly

I’ve been feeling kind of sickly for the last week, but more so today. Something strange is going on in my tummy and I don’t like it.

I hate going to the doctor in Japan. When I was in Korea, I could go to the International Clinic at Yonsei University and speak with an English speaking doctor who had at his or her command the latest technologies that medical science could offer.. and then some. In Japan I half expect to be prescribed a course of leeches.

From outside Japan looking in, you imagine a technological future society - but nothing is further from the truth. Although it may be the producer of Wii and mini-PCs, and although the Japanese have had internet on their phones for years, the core of the country is quite backward: paper based trails and technology which looks like it hasn’t changed since the 70s - everything is functional, and Japanese have a real unwillingness to upgrade.

Nowhere is this clearer than in a doctor’s waiting room. Walls of hand written cards holding patients details, with not a computer in sight. Equipment that is nothing more than a stethoscope, weighing scales, blood pressure reader, a bed on wheels, and pen and paper. Diagnosis is not read, but pointed to in medical books - presumably to get over the language barrier. It’s like a human version of google but limited only to simple medical searches and the “I’m feeling lucky” button: I say “my symptom is..”, he opens book and points to a page with the result. That’s it. They never actually solve or do anything, just randomly suggest some medicine or say “Hmmm, I’d better send you to someone who actually knows something”.

Fortunately my yearly medical is in 3 weeks time. If it’s in the same place as last year then it’s at a decent hospital, where they have tests and medical equipment (the kind that requires electricity and goes “beep”) at their disposal. I’ll wait to then, unless the symptoms suddenly get worse.

Feel free to send cards and grapes in the meantime.

Friday June 6
 
12:18
 
Big Cocks

Photos from the Kanamara Penis Festival a few weeks back, in Kanamara just outside Tokyo. More information about the festival is in this post.

I had thought that only the Japanese would be “open” enough to celebrate the penis. I was wrong. I’ve since found out the Korea has an entire Penis Park - a must visit the next time I’m in Korea.

Wednesday May 28
 
21:33
 
Look Spicy?

One of the foods I miss from Korea is mandu (gyoza/dumpling) cooked in spicy tokpokki sauce, sold by scary old women at stalls on the street.

This is my attempt - with tangmyeon (sweet potato noodle) and veg thrown in for good measure (replacing the rice cake, which I don’t particularly like anyway). Tasty, but not the same without the scary old woman saying “ommo - he can eat spicy food.”

Friday May 23
 
10:42
 
Charge By Passenger Weight

American began charging $25 for a second checked bag on May 12. The $15 for a first checked bag is to go into effect June 15 — although elite frequent fliers, those paying full fare and on international flights are exempt.

Fort Worth-based American, the nation’s largest carrier, said it needs extra revenue to cover fuel costs, which it says have soared by billions of dollars in the last few years.

If American airline companies want to raise extra money to cover fuel costs, why don’t they levy a charge for the huge fat arses and stomachs of Americans?

I’m serious about this. The last time I flew NWA, I couldn’t believe the size of the people. The guy sitting across the aisle from me could barely open the seat-back table in front of him - and when he did get it open, it was pushing into his stomach. It would have been so funny if he couldn’t have eaten because he was too fat to open the table.

There is nothing worse than being stuck next to a fatty on the plane. The huge jelly arms spilling over the armrest, invading into the little bit of seat space that I have.

When I fly Korean Air or Japan Airlines or Thai, the plane is full of Asians and normal sized people. When I fly a European company, the passengers are bigger. When I fly an American company, I’m amazed the plane can get off the ground.

I already find it obscene that I should have to pay extra to carry more luggage when some fat ass weighing double my weight has to pay nothing extra for his (or her) blubber:

Fatty: 150kg + 20kg luggage.
Me: 75kg + 20kg luggage. If I want to take more luggage, I should pay.

The price of an airline ticket fee should give you a combined weight allowance - say 120kg. When you arrive at the airport, you weigh yourself and the luggage. Anything over the allowance, you pay for. That way, us normal sized people can take a decent amount of luggage on holiday, and fat people whose excessive eating causes a burden on fuel can be penalised.

Fatty: 150kg + 20kg luggage -> 50kg penalty charge.
Me: 75kg + 20kg luggage -> 25kg extra luggage allowance.

However, now we’re being asked to pay extra to check in anything? When fatty can have as much blubber as he (or she) wants? Ridiculous.

It makes my idea of the “luggage coat” even more of a winner. My reasoning is this: I can weigh what the hell I like and still fly the plane - but my luggage is limited. Enter the “luggage coat” - a huge tent like coat with space inside to pack clothes and other goodies. Think a coat with two mini rucksacks inside.

It’s a sparkling idea. American airline companies could never say to you “Are you fat or is that luggage coat sir?” - they’d be sued to the high heavens. Simply wear it. Check in. Take it off and wheel it around on a trolley while doing duty free shopping. Put it back on to board. Then take it off again and put it in the overhead luggage space when on the plane.

Rant over. Time for cake.

Monday May 19
 
18:50
 
Korea Town

A few weeks ago I met a couple of Korean guys at Tonjang - the only REAL Korean BBQ that I’ve found in Tokyo. We got talking because they saw me speaking Korean, and we exchanged contact details. Last night we met up and headed to Shin-Okubo - the Korea Town of Tokyo - and ended up in a bar (pictured) which could have been lifted straight out of Shinchon in Seoul. For atmosphere, it was an excellent find.

I used to go to Shin-Okubo often, but stopped because I always ended up getting very drunk. Last night was no exception. Korean alcohol is lethal.

The whole night reminded me of all the things I miss about Korea - so much so that I actually started crying in the subway on the way to work this morning. The same thing happened at lunch.

Tears. Me?! I never cry.

I really miss Korea a lot.

I’d like the think it’s just the Tokyo-Japanese people I know, but it’s not. It’s difficult to bond with people here, full stop. It’s like going out to party with your mother tagging along - there’s always a restraint.

They only want to go out on weekends, not during the week. They are continually thinking of the subway home. They never let go and party or express their emotions. They don’t know how to live and be free.

It’s not just me that feels this way either. I’ve know people who have been in Japan for years, even people who speak fluent Japanese, and they tell me the same thing. There’s always a barrier - a shield - with Japanese. They are minding their Ps and Qs. You never really know what’s inside.

Last night I went out with Koreans that I had randomly met in a restaurant. We drank, ate, chatted, had an awesome time. I ended up getting a taxi home at 2am. I almost never made it into work this morning.

I have never done that with Japanese.

When I used to go to Shin-Okubo regularly, I’d always end up getting talking to a group of Koreans in a bar. We’d share bottles of Korean alcohol, to the extent that it was impossible to tell what one had actually consumed.

That has also never happened to me with Japanese, ever.

You can meet Koreans randomly, and become friends instantly. No guard. No hiding. No restraint. THAT is what I miss about Korea.

I better start finding more Korean friends if I’m to enjoy Tokyo.